Want.

I guess this is where i'm suposed to tell everyone that i was born without sanity?
life is so much more complicated with you around.
i've cried more often.
i've dreamed more often.
i've come to relize that my life would suck without you.
but everytime we talk, you talk about her.
you say you don't have feelings for her.
i belive you.
so much.
but she is all you can talk about.
:(

speak slow, tell me love, where do we go?
i've cried over you many times before.
i've recently cried because of our fights.
nobody really wins, persay.
but you know it's sad to look at who wins.
a fight between lovers is supposed to make their love stonger.
if they survive, that is.
but recently, i've been unable to let go of that meloncholy feeling i get everytime we do fight.
:(

when i'm feeling bad about something, you ask me what's wrong.
i say nothing.
you say tell the truth.
i begin to tell you everything.
my guts fall to the floor with a sharp smack.
tears fall.
you hush me and say it will be alright.
everything will be fine.
now you know everything.
about how i'm a failure.
insecure.
a liar.
an outcast.
but you know what it's like to be me.
:(

i miss you terribly right now.
more than i've ever missed anyone.
more than i've missed my best friend in the whole world.
it's because i'm in love with you.
it hurts me to hear you wishing for death to take you in your sleep.
it hurts me to hear about your past relationships and how they did you wrong.
it's all wrong, you and them.
if i told you i didn't love you, it would be the darkest kind of blasphemy.
if you told me you didn't love me...

well, i wouldn't make it out alive.